management

doing final in nursing is not the same as doing final during high school. this is much more hectic and tiring, did i mention is very challenging too?? sigh.. first, i have to attend lecture, do assignmentS, presentationS and practical.. the practical i'm doing right now is management, which means i have to learn how to manage the ward, patients, staffs and my nursing careS.. how am i going to do all that in just 12 days time?? i really don't know. the first day should have be the perfect day. but too bad, there isn't fairy tales in the reality, my first day turned out to be a bad day not worst (thank GOD).. i know i should not find any excuse for myself but going back to my own hospital make me feel alone and not at home, i do't know why.. maybe i have been away for 2 and a half years.. even ying said so.. going to gh or l** make me feel more at home because i know what can we do and what we cant do.. now, everything i do make me feel so afraid, therefore i looked as though i know nothing.. sigh~~ on the frist day, i've heard a rn whom i changed patient's diaper with talk behind my back to another rn saying "she said she doesnt knows how to do admission, is so different and etc." then on the 2nd day, i was looking through some folder before my shift and i heard the same boring voice talking behind my back again, saying "yesterday i changed diaper with the students, she only stand there waiting for me to teach her how to change diaper, waiting for me to get gloves and etc." well come on, that rn was standing next to the cabinet, of course she has to take the gloves an everything, dont tell me she expect me to get over her place and get the stuffs needed?? i agree, on the first day i do looked a little blur but this doesnt means i am a robotic nurse, duh!! dont she knows "DONT JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER" ? when i heard this, i was standing behind the screen so i kept quiet and ignore what seh said although in me i was fumign!! i want to let her know that do not talk behind peoples' back but straight confront right in front of her.. this is not ethical at all.. what other staffs will think of me then? dont tell me her words are not influential at all.. no matter how, people tend to listen more than see.. i dont care about her now, i will work what i have been taught and do the right things.. who cares about her?? this person will only be co-worker but not FRIEND.. thats all :p